Day 270 of 365: feel the suck. get the prize.

My boyfriend is a generally happy person. He lives his life in the middle numbers on the 1-10 scale. That’s kind of his base level of existence. When I get in wonky places, he’s able to easily snap me out of them. He’ll call me on my shit if I’m having a pity party, or […]

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Day 264 of 365: life is a carousel

Life is a carousel. With limited options of animals to ride. In time, all the creatures look the same. Eyes, mouths, legs, tails, up and down in predisposed rhythmic motions. Animal instincts ripped away, obsolete. I take a defibrillator to my perspective to jumpstart gratitude. Focus on details. Appreciate minutia. Spots. Stripes. Hues of fur. […]

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Day 262 of 365: the importance of “the dark night of the soul”

I’ve heard that a dark night of the soul is when all our worst fears manifest… And we live through them. And, just like a character in a movie, we are challenged to rise from the ashes and flourish into a better version of ourselves. For years, my primary fears were external… And ego-based. My […]

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Day 251 of 365: to feel different, I have to *be* different

Oh dear lord, the shit show I got myself into over the last week. So I was in Sedona, having an amazing vacation with my amazing cousin, and then I got triggered. Some ass hat tour guide was showing us vortexes and she thought she could hold space for emotional healing and: A. At no […]

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Day 249 of 365: cutting ties, and holding on for dear life

I hate that I struggle with suicidal shit sometimes. I really, really do. For a long time I didn’t. It was like an old friend to me. Now it’s more like a black hole… Or a magnet that attracts all my joy and flushes it. I haven’t wanted to write about it because I’m too […]

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Day 141 of 365: yo. it’s okay to be lazy.

I frequently should all over myself. I’ll get into this feedback loop in my mind where any anxious energy somehow spews out of the mental container and gets all over my mental to do list. I think anxiety and fear are just excitement without breath, and I believe the energy can be used to make […]

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Day 119 of 365: Goodbye, daily blog.

Right. So. I’ve been focusing on feeling emotions in my body rather than focusing all my energy on labeling them in my mind. And a couple hours ago, I was sitting on the sofa, feeling into my body… And I felt anxious and uncertain and afraid. And I was like,¬†what does this remind me of? […]

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Day 118 of 365: What I’ve Heard Real-Life People Say #2

Oddly enough, I was hesitant to post this. I was like… “OH NO. WHAT IF THIS IS OBJECTIFICATION OR HINTING AT THE TWISTED BELIEF THAT WOMEN SHOWING OFF THEIR BODIES IS AN INVITATION FOR SEX OR OR OR”… And then I was like… But… It’s funny… And relatable. Like, I’ve been there. I think we […]

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Day 117 of 365: Switching the approach + introducing daily real-life doodles

So. Here’s the thing. We are all on our own individual messy journey of self-discovery. Some people avoid/numb it, others embrace it and go with the flow, and then there are the folks who are overly dedicated to the point of burn-out and exhaustion. I BETCHA CAN’T GUESS WHICH ONE I AM. … IT’S THE […]

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